MY COACHING ROLE MODEL HAS DIED
An inspirational figure for me as a coach died last month. Her passing was a sad day for the hundreds of individuals around the world whose lives she touched. I had the somber responsibility of burying her in our back pasture. I am referring to our incredible buckskin mare, Vasha. She was our first horse, and her purchase coincided with my retirement to become a full-time coach. As strange as it may sound, she has been an example to me of three essential attributes in coaching people: building trust, instilling confidence, and communicating candidly.
She died of an apparent heart attack in my field on one of the coldest days of the year at the age of 24 (roughly 70 in human years). In all the time we had her, she never once bucked or acted up. We had complete trust that she would take good care of whoever was on her back. She became my mother's horse and was used for all new riders, including most of my parent's 48 grandchildren, who visited every summer from across the globe. There was something truly magical about seeing fear turn to joy in the face of a hesitant rider as they gained the confidence to do something they had never done before. Their rock-solid trust in Vasha made that possible.
My Dad is building a marker, and we plan to remember her with a brief service during our family reunion this summer. This picture above is of my nephew Ethan. He lives in England and is an incredible boy who happens to be autistic. He loved riding Vasha and would sometimes talk to her while doing so. Here again, Vasha exemplified another coaching attribute: the ability to just shut up and listen. As neither Ethan nor Vasha understands nuance, clear, direct communication works best. My father told me that during the last ride he took with Ethan on Vasha, he glanced over at the boots my Dad was wearing and innocently asked, "Grandpa, I really like those boots. Can I have them when you die?" Vasha didn't leave me any boots when she died, just great insight into how to coach and develop people.
